CVC Succcess Group coaches Jerry & Sheryl Isenhour
Fear can freeze you in your tracks. We have all been there before. Sometimes you just have to
step out of your comfort zone. In this week’s episode of The Chimney and Fireplace Success
Network podcast we talk about how each of us fail from time to time but your success is
developed from your failure. It is all about how you work through your fear of failure.
The Chimney and Fireplace Success Network is a weekly podcast brought to you by the CVC
Success Group and hosted by industry expert, Jerry Isenhour. Each week you will find new
presentations to assist business owners and managers in turning their business dreams into
their business realities.
Jerry Isenhour: Fears, how often it stops so many people in their tracks. Comfort zones, where we so commonly dwell, right inside of our comfort zones. Combine the two, fear and comfort zones, and it can actually freeze you right in your path. Just stop what you’re doing.
It can be each of these alone, or it can be these two combined. So, stick with me, and after we come back from this short message, we are going to be talking today about fears and comfort zones.
In your life, what are the fears that you have had?
In your life, what are the fears that you have? What are your fears? And one of the leading fears that so many people have is a fear of failure, that’s right after you’re a failure. But if we look through our lifetime, how many times have we come up against the fear? You know we’ve all got our fears; it can be any number of things. You know, personally, I’ll be honest with you, I’ve got a little fear of snakes.
Some people have a fear of spiders, snakes, creepy crawlies other things. Other people can pick a snake up, doesn’t bottom in the least. In my lifetime, I’ve had a fear of flying. I could remember the first time getting on an airplane, sitting there in the waiting area for the flight to be called, almost soaking wet with sweat. And what I had to go through over the years, because in my job, I have to get on airplanes. And today, I’ve conquered that fear, and I get on them quite often fly across the country, flown across the world. And I did this because I had to face that fear.
Why are the wings on the plane shaking?
I had to go through some coaching in this. I had to face up. Why are the wings on this plane shaking? Why do they kind of flap out there when you look at it? And knowing and understanding what caused that. That was able for me to get past that fear of flying. But again, so many of us have a fear of failure in our life, we’re afraid that we’re going to do something we’ll fail, and we don’t know how to face that failure.
Maybe it’s within our self; maybe we feel that if others see us fail, we’ll be embarrassed by that failure. So we’re scared to put ourselves out, and we’re scared to go to the dreams that we want in life because we’ve got this fear. And see compounding these fears is the comfort zones of this world. But see, there are some things in life that we have to come out of our comfort zones; let me give you a few examples.
You know there was a time that every one of us was resting peacefully in our mother’s womb, but there came a day, a day when it was time, and we had no choice in this; we had to leave the comfort, and we had to face the real world. You ever wonder what it felt like when you were a baby and you first saw the real world in front of you? When a doctor possibly had you by your legs, pulling you, holding you up, remember the spanking that they always gave you to get the baby breathing?
Do you remember as a child
But that had to be a fear. Because we were in a comfort zone. How about another time? Do you remember as a child, did you ever ride a bicycle? Was there ever a time that you feared riding that bicycle because you may fail. And you may just fall, get bruised, get all kinds of things, skinned up, knees whatever. But so many of us stepped out of our comfort zones, and we got on that bicycle, and we were able to ride and balance that bicycle.
And we kept going through life with all these things. You know, one of the big motivational seminars I’ve heard in my life was a man by the name of Steve Harvey. And Steve Harvey was talking to a television audience one day and talked about coming out of your comfort zones. Where you’ve got to come out of that comfort zone, and how so many people were scared to what he called jump. But as he went through this presentation, I highly encourage you to listen to it; you can find it on YouTube.
People that finally decided to jump
But he talked about people that finally decided to jump. Now sometimes, they got battered, they got bruised, and that’s the thing about it. In life, yes, we’re going to have some cuts and some scrapes and other things in life. But you know, in order to move to where you want to go, like Steve Harvey said, you got to jump. You got to just make a decision when it’s time for you to jump and move out of that comfort zone and into the path that’s going to take you to what we call your dreams. And you know we all got dreams, we all got these places in life that we want to go. But we’ve also got our fears; we’re scared we’re going to fail. We really and truly have these fears of failure.
But what we’ve got to do is we’ve got to learn that yes, failure is going to be a bigger part of life than victories are going to be. But as John Maxwell advises, we also have to learn to fail forward. In other words, each and every time that we fail at anything we do, there’s a lesson to be learned from this. And this is part of the life lessons that each and every one of us goes through, about how we learn from our failures.
Failure just overtakes you all at once
You are riding along, and failure just overtakes you all at once. Let me give you an example, you are riding down a highway, riding down the interstate highway, and suddenly, you look up, and there are blue lights behind you. Because you didn’t even realize it, you had been exceeding the posted speed limit. And those blue lights are coming after you because they’re going to write you a ticket.
You ever had that happen? When it happens, as you’re sitting on the side of the road, how are you feeling? And there are so many times in life that we go through this because, you see, life presents us our comfort zones. And that’s where many reside in their entire lives; they stay within that comfort zone. But in order to come out of that comfort zone, you got to be willing to face fear. You got to be willing to face failure. Because at times, failure is going to happen to all of us.
The light bulb, it was not an overnight success
If we look at Thomas Edison, the inventor of the light bulb. It wasn’t an overnight success. Thomas Edison said he built a thousand light bulbs before he had the first success. And it happens all the time. Look at so many singers, rock and roll stars, sports players; what happens is they have got to come out of that comfort zone. What is your comfort zone? What are your fears? What’s it going to take you to step outside of that comfort zone and move forward?
Because there’s one thing for certain, this is a very scary world out there. As we look at the world around us, failures are happening everywhere. Failures are happening to other people; you’re not the only one that’s ever failed. Sometimes I look at my own life and think, you know, I think I’m the king of failure in my life. But you got to keep moving forward. Those of you who are listening this, and you may be in a second or third marriage, earlier ones failed possibly.
You got to step up to the plate
Did it stop you from finding the happiness in life that you were looking for? When you found that right partner to spend life with? You could have never moved to that stage if you’d had a fear of failure of another relationship. So here’s what you got to do. You got to step up to the plate. You got to look at your fears; you look at your failures; you look at your comfort zones. And what you have got to do is decide where do you want to go in life, what do you want to accomplish in your time here on God’s green earth.
What do you want to accomplish? What do you want to live? Where do you want to go? What are the things that you want to do? And you’ve got to set your path, your GPS to get there. Are there going to be some cuts and scrapes and bruises on the way? You better believe it. It’s going to happen. It happens to all of us; it’s a part of life. But here is what I know, the people that are willing to step out of those comfort zones.
Willing to move beyond their fears
The people that are willing to move beyond their fears and move past the failures they have had. And learn from each and every one of these, they’re getting to where they want to be in life. And isn’t that where you want to go? Well, listen, stick around for a minute; I’m going to turn the mic over to Sheryl in just a minute.
I have no idea what she’s going to share with you today, because as we put our podcasts together, we each have different thoughts. So we’ll turn the mic over to Sheryl, stick around just a few minutes, and she’ll be right with you with what I call Sheryl’s tidbits of wisdom for the week.
Failure is an event, it is not a person
Sheryl: I don’t know how many people have heard this, but failure is an event; it is not a person. We have all failed, no one has ever not failed in life, and I mean no one. It happens to all of us at some point in our journey. Not one of us can claim perfection. If you are one of the mature age as I am, we grow up in a time that it seems we dared failure. I grew up in the age of the saying, hold my beer, watch this. The group of neighborhood kids I grew up with let me back up just a second and explain my neighborhood first. My nearest neighbor was over a mile away.
We had to actually go to each other’s house, instead of just crossing the street. And my neighborhood was made up of 13 boys and two girls. So I grew up in the guy’s world. I rode horses that they said could not be broken, and they were right. The time on the horse was much shorter than the time I spent getting up off the ground. I jumped off roofs of houses that my dad was building. Basically, because I seemed a lot easier than climbing down the ladder.
Why is it that so many of us take failure personally?
I walked across things on boards that I would have punished my kids for doing. Let’s just say I was very lucky to have not failed at these times. Other times I wasn’t so lucky and turned out black and blue. But instead of crying over the failure, at least learned not to do it again. It was only event and was caused by me. We are imperfect in our own unique ways. So why is it that so many of us take failure personally? Why do we attach failure as a label to ourselves? Processes fail, ideas fail, but failure is not a person.
Even when people talked, as Jerry said earlier, about the hundred or thousand failures of Edison at the invention of the light bulb, he told them that it was not failure, but it was 999 ways not to do it. It’s all and how a person looks at it. As I said, no one’s perfect. So why would you beat yourself up because you flopped?
Failures are a chance to learn what is not working
As Einstein said, failures are a chance to learn what is not working, what is not perfect. And then be able to change the game. If you don’t fail, how would you know what success really looks like or what it feels like? Failure must happen to find out where to adjust the sales and move us forward. It must occur to most of these toxic entities out of a path, so that can we see what we’re really needing to bring to life. And where we’re meant to live.
Failure is not to be feared, rather embraced. I know it may be hard for many to hear because we’ve all been conditioned that failure is negative. And yes, failing is a great disappointment; you never want to fail; it’s not your intention. Our intentions are to be successful in our pursuits. However, if we didn’t have those failures, how do you know when you’re ahead in the game of life? I look back at all the failures I experience, and I look at them with gratitude.
I learned such valuable lessons
Why? Because I learned such valuable lessons. Failure has brought me some great successes in life because I tried, and I tried, and I tried again until I got it right. To make that statement, it took me a long time to come around to this mindset. If you look at your failures as a chance to learn and move forward, you can take failure as a moment of gratitude. Remember, you have two choices. Spend time seeking failure as a depressing event, or you can look at it as a wonderful gift that you’ve been given to see that you are spared a lot of heartache and pain and to be shown the better way. Again, without failing, how do that it is a better way?
Failure us just an event in life
Our perception of failure and the attitude of how we address the events is what makes the difference. We are not failures; we’re not perfect either. We are people who fail with great success and see the rewards that failure brings to our lives. Failure is just an event in life; it doesn’t define us. With these words, I’m going to turn it back over to Jerry to wrap up today’s message, and as always, be able to say you’re glad you did, instead of you wish you had.
Jerry Isenhour.: Well, that’s Sheryl’s thoughts on fears, failures, comfort zones. And as usual, she has shared some sound words of wisdom. I want to take you back to a time in the early 1980s. Early 1980s, I had to step out of my comfort zone, and it changed the course of my life by doing this. Because the company contacted me, you may remember it if you have been in the industry for a lot of years, there is a company by the name of August West.
I had never spoken to a group of people such as this
And at the time, August West was putting on seminars around the USA. And they sent me a note, and they said Jerry, we’d like you to come and speak at our August West seminar in Nashville, Tennessee, at the Opryland hotel. Now at the time, I had never spoken to a group of people such as this. So were there fears, was there fears of failures, was there a comfort zone I was going to have to step out of. Because number one, remember the fear of flying because they were going to fly me to Nashville, Tennessee.
It was a fear of walking in front of a room, of people that I did not know to share processes and methods that work for me. But would they be worthy of others? Well, I got on that plane, I went to Nashville, rented the first car I ever had in my life. Checked into the Opryland hotel and did the presentation. And that was the moment that I knew that I loved to speak to people, and that was a time that started me on doing training and speaking all those years ago. And today, it’s where I can speak to people such as this very comfortably, in just an audio format or in a public forum, or in a live stream presentation. You know, and I’m sure that’s where you’re at. There are so many people I talk to; they have a fear of talking to a camera. They have a fear of appearing on the camera.
You are going to have to step out of your comfort zone
They have a fear of doing presentations on their Facebook profiles. When at the same time, live streaming is acknowledged as a future way to go to market your business. But in order to do this effectively, you’re going to have to step out of that comfort zone. You’re going to have to come to realization that you’re going to stumble some words, but it’s not going to be the end of the world; it’s truly not. Because we’re all human beings, and as you make these changes and how you mark your business in the future.
And how you deal with the future consumers, yes, there’s going to be times you’re going to step out of your comfort zone. It’s just like talking to an upset customer. Is this outside your comfort zone? Do you lose control during these periods of time? Sometimes we do. But what we have to do is learn from these failures, and we have to be determined to be better at what we do. And that is what you are going to have to do if you are going to get to those elusive dreams.
Opportunities exist outside of comfort zones
Getting to those dreams in life requires you to step outside of comfort zones because the opportunities exist outside that comfort zone, not inside of it. And I know so many people now that have stepped out of their comfort zones in life have faced their fears and have failed at times. But have used what they learned from those failures, and they’re failing forward. So what about you, what’s your choice? Do you want to stay and reside in that comfort zone and never live and see your dreams?
Are you going to let fears and the fear of failure stop you from moving to where you really want to go in this world? Again, that’s your choice. You can make your own decisions. Because see, this is the one thing I know, your success, your dreams depend on one person, and that’s you. It depends on you. It depends on the actions that you take and the steps that you take. And the stairs that you walk up, to get to those dreams that you hold so dear, that you really want to live in the limited time that we each have on this earth.
And with that, we want to thank you for joining us again this week on the chimney and fireplace success network. My name is Jerry Isenhour; my co-presenter is Sheryl Isenhour. We’re part of the subject matter team at CVC success group. If you need help, if you need a mentor if you need someone to help you, get to those elusive dreams. Let’s have a conversation, and let’s get you started, and let’s get you moving towards those dreams. It’s as simple as reaching out to us at Info@CVCsuccessgroup.com.
Look us up on the web, follow us on our social media, and we look forward to talking to you when you’re ready to make those steps that are going to take you from simply dreaming into the dreams being your reality. Talk to you next time, as always, it’s been an honor, it’s been a privilege, and it’s been a pleasure.