CVC Succcess Group coaches Jerry & Sheryl Isenhour
Do you ever go over a conversation you are about to have with a person in your head, to
prepare yourself for it?
Does the thought of having particular conversations give you anxiety?
Join us this week on The Chimney & Fireplace Success Network podcast for Psyching Yourself
Up For Your Next Performance. In this podcast, Jerry and Sheryl will be discussing how the way
we communicate and the conversations we have are really just performances. Putting your best
foot forward, being clear and self-aware will help you in overcoming the anxiety you may feel
and we will help you with successful tool to do this. Skills that will help with doing live videos,
job interviews, hard conversations, and pretty much any communication you have.
The Chimney and Fireplace Success Network is a weekly podcast brought to you by the CVC
Success Group and hosted by industry expert, Jerry Isenhour. Each week you will find new
presentations to assist business owners and managers in turning their business dreams into
their business realities.
Jerry Isenhour: One of the most important things that you must do, is to get ready for your next performance. This requires important preparation. You see, your next performance could be as a leader, it could be as a presenter, perhaps a teacher. It could be that you’re a salesperson. You may be talking to your boss; you may be talking to those you lead.
You may be talking to your spouse, your children, a client, or any number of situations. Just as any performer must psych themselves up before they walk in stage. If you if you are going to do the best job of communication because that is what communication is, it is a performance. Stay tuned with me as we go over how to psych yourself up and what the process is to get ready for that. Stay with us for the rest of the story.
How To Have The Difficult Conversation
Here at CVC success group, one of our team members is Erin Marcus. And what Erin Marcus specializes in is how to have the difficult conversation. And as we look at the conversations that we have throughout life, many times, they’re often going to involve difficult conversations. Because if you are going to speak honestly, and you are going to speak from the heart, sometimes the conversation will be difficult. It’s likely that you face this prospect of a performance every single day, multiple times in a day even.
It could be in your role as an employee; it could be your role as a manager. It could be in your role as a person you manage, with the customer, with the client, any number of scenarios could come to play. What you have got to do is pull yourself together. You got to get your thoughts composed, and you got to learn to speak in the most professional manner no matter who the other person is on the other side of the conversation.
Often We Are Facing This Challenge
But you see, this is one of the things that goes on. Often, we’re facing this challenge. And we have a conversation coming up; we must know it is going to be a performance. And as human beings, we face anxiety. Maybe we lose sleep over; maybe we run through our minds, how do I do this? But you see, one of the problems is that anxiety is a form of panic. Panic causes our breathing to be altered. Some of us often undergo what we call a panic attack.
Our blood pressure rises. Our breathing changes. We also often have a fear of failure so often. If you are a deep-sea diver, you have trained that panic could be the worst thing you could go through. Why? Because when we panic, our breathing changes, and we use up the available air that we have in an oxygen tank. But we always got to keep in mind, and I learned this when I went through my sales certification training with Jeffrey Gitomer.
The Sales Presentation Is A Sales Performance
When he called the sales presentation is a sales performance because that is what every time that you speak is, it is a performance. And every performance that you go through, you got to be prepared for the performance. But see, we’ve also got to be able to prepare quickly for any scenario we may find ourselves in. The need for this performance could arise at any time simply by a phone call we receive, an email we read, and many times, it’s even the social post that we oppose the viewpoint of.
And so many of us just have to hit that keyboard, and we never properly prepare our thoughts. Because we’ve just got these things that we got to say it, and we got to get it out. And I mean that’s one of the great things about social media because you can type it all down, and then you can delete it. But the problem is once you’ve spoken words, it’s impossible to delete those words. So, you have got to properly prepare for the communication episodes, the communication scenarios that you are going to be involved in. There is no deletion of spoked words, just the pain that can be the result of the unspoken words, pain by both the person who spoke them and the person who heard them.
Words Will Often Be Challenged
Failure to prepare and to be prepared can turn into a situation where your opinions and words will often be challenged. You see as a part of our preparation; we have got to anticipate objections. We teach this in our sales classes. But what we’ve got to do is understand what the others may object to. And in the communication process, we go in and deal with the anticipated objections. If you’re experienced as a communicator, hopefully, you’ve been trained in sound bites. If you have not been, you need to think about it.
What Is A Sound Bite
So what is a sound bite? A sound bite is being able to say things in such a profound way that it makes people think. And in order to become an expert at presenting your opinions and sound bites, you’ve got to listen to what others are saying and what they’re writing. Not just looking at it from the aspect of replying to their comments, replying to their questions, rather of understanding what the other person is thinking. This is a skill that if you can develop this skill, it’s going to take your leadership abilities, your sales abilities to an entirely new level for you.
You see if you do not have the proper research if you do not have the proper preparation. If you haven’t prepared your words properly, you may just speak words that you wish you could delete later. You see, in preparation; it may require some research. If you’re going to present it in a sound bite again, that makes people stop and think. Sheryl and I have just completed a three-day distinction summit by one of our coaches and mentors by the name of Scott McCain.
An Actor By The Name Of Glen Morshower
And in this summit, he had several phenomenal people that made appearances. Some you may have heard of, some that you may not have heard of. And one of the presenters there was an actor by the name of Glenn Morshower. And if you don’t know who Glenn is, he’s an actor who has appeared in hundreds of movies and television shows. He’s probably best known for playing secret service agent Aaron Pierce in a show by the name of 24.
But Scott had him on the program, and in the program, he shared something that I had never considered before. And that is that actors are continuously searching for jobs; they’re always looking for work. Because you are not likely going to get an acting gig that is going to last you for a number of years. And you are probably not going to retire from that gig unless you are very elderly.
Competes For Every Acting Opportunity
And Glenn shared how he often competes for every acting opportunity and the gigs he is going to try to get for himself. And one of the things that he has to do is he has to compete for that job, and he competes for that job with others who are really good at what they do. So what he’s got to do is he has to prepare himself to walk into that audition, and he has to prepare for the words he’s going to use. He’s got to study the script and possibly even study the background of what he does. So he psyches himself up and walks into there. And then he shared with us the last thought that he tells himself before he walks into that audition.
He’s got himself psyched up, he’s got it all ready to go, and then he tells himself something, and before I say this, I want to offer an apology; I hope this doesn’t offend anyone. But here’s what he says. He says to himself, watch this shit, watch what I’m getting ready to do. Because what he’s done, he has morphed into the character he’s auditioning to play. He has morphed himself into it with the speech, the manner of speaking he uses.
We Have Got To Thoroughly Understand
His words, his facial expression, the accent required, the hand motions. And you see, this is what each of us must do to psych ourselves up; we have got to thoroughly understand what it’s going to take to convince others of what our point of view is.
We also heard from another remarkable young lady; her name was Sage Steele. Sage Steele is a sports anchor on ESPN, that is right. She is a female sports anchor. And as we listened to Sage’s words, she is an extremely outgoing lady. It was amazing to listen to her in this summit.
She Was Shy, She Was Withdrawn
She explained how in her younger days, she was shy. She was withdrawn, and how she’s now becoming an outgoing and I would even call it almost a bubbly persona. And then, she talked how she got mad and how she wanted to be a sports anchor and the challenges of being a female sports anchor and her process was to set up her dream. And the things that she was ready to do to live her dream. And then, she shared with us additional challenges that she faces today.
She Is Challenged to Select Her Race
Because Sage Steel is biracial, she has a black father and a white mother. And people challenge her all the time to select her race. But she doesn’t want to select her race because both her father and her mother, one who’s black and one who is white, were her influences and part of her makeup here on this earth. And she talked about how she had been challenged, how she had been challenged by a lady by the name of Barbara Walters, we have all heard of this.
Challenged By Barbera Walters
Challenged on television, and what Sage had to do was maintain her composure. And you see that’s part of the sales performance, is how well do you maintain your composure? And this is part of being prepared. And you see, what you’re also going to have to do if you’re going to get psyched up, you have got to be prepared to step out of your comfort zone to make it happen. You know, one of the things that I suggest to so many of my clients and to others is to build your community authorities.
And one of the ways to do this is to speak in a video format through live streaming broadcasts and other things through social media. But so often, if someone puts a video camera and right in front of our face, so many freeze up. This could be the case if you have an opportunity to talk to a reporter. It could be any number of scenarios. What are your weak areas? What are your strong areas?
One Of The Amazing Things
And you know one of the things that is amazing to me because, in my lifetime, I have been able to meet and discuss things with a lot of very well-known people in this world. And this is one of the amazing things that I found is that some of the most outgoing best speakers on the stage are basically introverts. And they don’t deal well one-on-one. But put them in front of a crowd of five hundred to a thousand, they can amaze you with the messages, with all the things that they can say. And the bigger the crown the more they build out words and their presentation.
And this comes from their ability to psych themselves up. Here’s what I want you to watch when you watch great people get ready to go onto a stage. If you look at a sports star getting ready to hit the field, look at anyone we consider to be a world leader. Look at their ability to command the microphone, look at their ability of being able to speak to others. Look at how they prepare themselves, and look how the words they chosen that they choose are perfect for the situation. How do you do this? You have got to train yourself. Imagine a President walking off the plane, you think he does not physic himself up before he steps out of the door of the plane onto the stairs?
Take A Hard Look At Your On Communication Style
You have got to take a hard look at your own communication style. I’ve said this many times in classes, in presentations; if you’ve listened to my podcast, you’ve heard me say this before. But the best speakers in the world, the ones that can get the message across number one, they’ve done the research to speak in a professional, knowledgeable manner. But most of all, I have noted that one of the leading skills that all these people possess is the ability to listen to others.
Understand What The Other Is Thinking
Not to form a reply, rather to understand what the other is thinking and what the other is saying. So these are various ways for you to psych yourself up. Because as a leader, as a parent, as a manager, as an employee, as a salesperson, as a technician, no matter what your role is in life.
The ability to communicate properly is one that’s going to take you to the highest levels; it’s going to manage to move you to where you want to go in this world. Stay tuned because in just a minute, Sheryl will be joining you with the words of wisdom that Sheryl brings to every one of these podcasts. So, do not go away because Sheryl’s coming to the mic. And she is going to share her tidbits of wisdom for the week with you.
How Do You Prepare Yourself Before A Performance
Sheryl Isenhour: How do you prepare yourself before a performance? You know life can be like a theater performance. Here’s how to prepare yourself so that you can be the shining best. You have to practice at life, just like you do at a theatrical performance. Many times, this is called trial and error in real life. The problem with life is that there is not always someone out there saying let’s do a retake.
We have to master the changing of a mistake to a positive with, first of all, take the blame and own it. And then comes the communication it takes to make it right. While no show is perfect, with persistence, you can create a very satisfying result.
You cannot perform at your best when your health is failing. If you’ve been up late, this is from the top of the pyramid, the leader all the way down to the workers. But your performance, you need the rest that it takes to think straight. You need to be able to go over the day situation, so you can get your lines right.
How Can You Ever Expect Someone To Understand
Without being clear with what you want, how can you ever expect anyone to understand what you are wanting? Also, anxiety about your meeting or your conversation, your performance can keep you awake, and you’ll not be able to be near as effective. Don’t go into your performance when you’re hungry; the feeling of hunger will draw your attention away from your objective.
Remember, you need to focus to perform your task. Again, your performance. Don’t enter your performance without preparation; the way your communication goes will be in line with how it was prepared. Always be prepared. Be aware, talking behind closed doors is like being backstage.
Make Them Feel They Can Do Th Best Job
Do not say anything behind closed doors that you are not prepared to explain on the main stage. This is too often presumed as drama and drama should never show up in business, especially from the leader. This performance will always come back to you in an extremely negative way. So now, let’s give your crew, your employee’s compliments to try to uplift and move them. Make them feel they can do the best job; remember the point of theater; your business is to enjoy the performance and reach the level that both you and your employee want to get to. And next, give your audience, your customer the best experience they will ever have. It’s not always about the cost of the ticket; it’s about the performance of the crew. The ultimate experience is what you strive for; the ultimate experience is what your customer expects.
The Ultimate Customer Experience
The ultimate customer experience is what they will tell other potential customers about. The other thing that will be told about is the crappy performance. What kind of review do you want them to write about you? About your performance? Your personal life and your business life are both performances. Performing to your family, the examples you set for your children because believe me, they will do more of what they see you do than they will ever do of what you tell them to do.
Leading By Example
The performance you show to your employees, leading by example, and the performance you show to your clients, the ultimate experience. What kind of performance are you going to give? And as my friend and Coach Scott McCain said in his book, ALL BUSINESS IS SHOW BUSINESS. That’s enough said by me today; I’m turning this back over to Jerry to wrap up our performance of the day.
All Business Is Show Business
Jerry ISENHOUR: welcome back with me. I hope what Sheryl just shared with you were some great words for you to consider. Because Sheryl has become a great presenter, she had to face her anxieties of going onto a stage; she went through a lot of training to do that and has become a tremendous speaker.
Given You Great Ideas
Both one-on-one with people and to a group. Hopefully, today, we’ve given you some great ideas. No matter if you need to psych yourself up to do a live video, to do a job interview, to do any type of communication. And maybe we have even allowed you to psych yourself up for those hard conversations, where you maintain your composure.
She Credited Her Father
You know, thinking back to what Sage Steele shared with us just an hour ago in the summit that we just completed. But she actually credited her father, as I researched and listened and looked up Sage during her presentation since it was a virtual presentation. Her father was a military officer; he was a colonel. And as a child, she had a very well-rounded childhood.
She Now Faces A Life Of Accountability
A childhood of accountability, Sage even shared where every Saturday morning her father had room inspection of her and her brothers, every Saturday morning. She now faces a life where accountability is so important, she said this was the way I was raised. So think about that, because if you’re a parent, think of the little people that you’re influencing every day.
Those young people that you brought into this world and you have the charge of developing into the responsible adults of tomorrow. But also remember that each and every communication that you have, it’s going to be a performance. It has to be honest; it has to be from the heart. And it has to be said in a way that it presents your point of view in a way that makes people think. And with that, we are going to end today’s podcast here on the chimney and fireplace success network.
We Are CVC Success Group
We are CVC success group; my name is Jerry Isenhour. And if we can help you in any way, turn your business dreams into your business realities for both your business and your personal life, reach out to us here. We have a team of subject matter experts, and we’re ready to help you in any way that we can. Isn’t it time that we had a conversation? Appreciate you joining us, as always. It’s an honor, it’s a pleasure, and it’s a privilege to be able to speak to you in this manner.